Chris enjoyed going camping with his family and friends. He couldn’t wait for our family trips to the Mountains. He loved cars, especially Hondas and muscle cars. He spent many weekends riding 4-wheelers with his friends. He would light up a room and make everyone smile. He often quoted Adam Sandler at just the right funny moment. He would do anything for anyone. We miss you, Chris!
Chris went through different stages in his disease of addiction. He used alcohol. Chris was worried about driving and losing his license so he told his friends he would have to switch from alcohol to marijuana. It seemed as if he was self-medicating. He hid his addiction from his family. He was embarrassed. He felt the stigma. When I walked in on Chris doing heroin, he said I thought you knew about my problem and chose to ignore it. He was ready to go for help and I took him to a local emergency room. They told us that we should get opiates from the street because heroin kills, and then find a treatment facility. This was 12 years ago, and improvements have been made in treatment, but much more work still needs to be done. No one seeking help should ever be turned away. We eventually got into an outpatient treatment center. According to the addiction psychiatrist, Chris had significant success. He was above average in his desire to stop drugs and in his success via suboxone and counseling. He had two documented relapses while under treatment. Chris told his girlfriend that he was not afraid of overdosing. He thought he knew the right dose that wouldn’t be fatal. He didn’t take into account that his body could no longer handle the same amount of heroin as it did before, that he didn’t know how pure the substance was, and that it could be laced with something else, like fentanyl. He asked me for narcan. I was not educated enough to know that narcan should be in every house if there is a need. Chris felt isolated. He told me there is more to me than drugs. He said his friends don’t want to be around me anymore. He gave up. I was telling him if he didn’t stop doing drugs, the girl he loved would leave him. He said, I don’t care. Threatening and harassing family members with addiction won’t work. Getting help and giving hope and support will make a difference.
If anyone is reading Chris’ story and has a family member with the disease of addiction, please know there is hope. There is help out there and you can’t do it on your own. Go to a well-reviewed inpatient facility. Be prepared for relapses and don’t get discouraged. Get educated so you know enough to do everything you can to help save your loved one. Don’t ever give up and don’t let your loved one give up.
